She Taught Me How to be a Mother...
I roll my eyes and snap at my mother sometimes, not my proudest moments. I can be impatient and get quickly irritated when snippets of advice are thrown my way. You see nowadays some of us “know it all” moms don’t seek advice from our mothers. We are far too “sophisticated” for that, opting to take guidance from the wealth of resources on the internet, ranging from journals to blogs to Facebook Mommy Groups. In my mom’s day there was no internet to search when your kid’s poop is green. Parenting guidance was passed down through the generations from good old word of mouth; mother to mother. I do feel guilty sometimes for dismissing my mom’s advice on this or that. I don’t mean to make her feel unimportant or irrelevant. In reality, she is extremely relevant to who I am and strive to be as a mother. The most important truths about what it takes to be a good woman and mom, were passed down to me years ago by none other than my amazing mother.
My Mother taught me how to care for my family. As a child with chronic asthma, I was always sick. My mother spent many sleepless nights at my bedside healing me with love and compassion. The stroke of her hand on my head when I was sick or sad always made me feel better. This was just the icing on the cake to the special meals and extra attention that she showered on me at those times. Thanks to her I knew instinctively how to care for my son as he grew in the NICU and recovered from his open heart surgery. When his little eyes looked up at me filled with appreciation for the first time, I knew he felt loved and cared for by his mom, just like I did.
My Mother is a master multi-tasker. My mother juggled many things when we were growing up. We were four girls of varying ages and stages, but she managed it all. We started our days with amazing, home cooked breakfasts, complemented by freshly squeezed juices. As children often do, we made faces and complained, not realizing how much effort it took for her to prepare such a feast and at such an ungodly hour of the morning. She chauffeured us to and from school, activities and tutoring 6 days a week. With four kids, this must have been the schedule from hell, but she never missed a beat. She managed crises of all kinds, from tiny, hurt feelings to big broken hearts… all in a day’s work.
My mother exemplifies the word "Matriarch." She is not just our mother, she is everyone’s mother. She went to great lengths to make sure our extended family was well taken care of too. She bought school books and uniforms for our cousins when they needed it and offered career help and guidance too. She took care of my ailing and elderly grandparents on both sides with the highest level of love and patience. She never failed to reign in an unruly uncle and dedicated her love and time to helping a severely drug addicted family member. My mother was and still is a lifeline and role model to many in our extended family.
My mother taught me how to celebrate life, loved ones and make "forever memories." She always made each of us feel special by celebrating our accomplishments and milestones in style with all of our friends and family together. There was not a birthday, anniversary, graduation or any special occasion that went by without a party. Music, laughter, great food and loved ones often filled our house. I'll never forget these moments and hope I can create such a happy life for my own family.
Now as a sometimes “barely making it through the day” mother of two, I am in awe of my mother. Her relentless energy, love and dedication for her family is inspiring to say the least. Mummy, I may not feed the baby a bottle when you think it’s needed or give solid food before the 6 month mark, but I want you to know what a big role you play in who I am as a mom. I’m so grateful that you have shown me what it means to be a good woman and a good mother. I don’t say it nearly enough, but I truly appreciate, love and admire you… more than you’ll ever know! Happy Mother’s Day from daughter number 3!
© Nicola Rios Nogales and ispeakmom.com, 2016. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Nicola Rios Nogales and ispeakmom.com with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.