Yes it’s true, a mother’s job is never done. Most times weekdays roll right into weekends without much change in the daily routine. Babies have no concept of the weekend and tyrannous toddlers may even wake up an hour earlier, just to mess with their tired moms.
I sat nervously in the viewing area, peering through the glass. The air was filled with the smell of chlorine and the sounds of little feet hitting water, splishes, splashes and delightful screams.
I looked on in horror. My face turned purple, red, blue and then grey! There it was, on the floor of the nail salon! This was by far THE most embarrassing moment of my life.
This week on Grey’s Anatomy, one of my absolute favorite shows, Moms Callie and Arizona faced off in a brutal custody battle over their daughter Sofia. This episode highlighted several issues that are relevant and controversial today, but I won’t get into those. Instead, I have chosen to take away what I think is an important lesson for me as a mom and for all parents.
I put down my pen over a year ago and couldn’t pick it up again until recently. Writing would mean thinking about and processing my emotions and for a while it was just too tough. It has been a difficult year and I have found my resilience is not what it used to be. But somehow here I am, getting to the green side of the grass, healing and making it through the throes of motherhood.
I sometimes feel guilty for dismissing my mom’s advice on this or that. I don’t mean to make her feel unimportant or irrelevant. The truth is, she is extremely relevant to who I am and strive to be as a mother.
Today I fell apart. After several months of “holding it together” I was reduced to a weeping, mess of tears as I held my sweet, sleeping 19 month old son in my arms. As he rested comfortably against my chest, a deep sadness came over me. Next week begins another period of trial for our family. It seems like we are about to relive some of the worst nightmares of our past.
One year ago today I brought my baby home for the first time. It was a blissfully happy day that I had dreamed of for many months. There were moments when I doubted that it would ever happen, but it finally came.
With the dreaded Enterovirus D68 making its presence in my state, my NICU mommy, post traumatic, germ-o-phobia is rearing its ugly head. Between Entero, Ebola and Chikungunya cases filling my newsfeed and dominating the media, I am all but ready to purchase a bubble for the three of us.
Since bringing our baby home almost a year ago, the hubs and I have not had a single date night. Sure we have gone to an early dinner here or there with baby in tow, but it's not the same.
"As long as it's healthy"... A term used by many a pregnant mom, daddy-to-be, grandma-to-be and even random stranger. I myself have used this term many times without a second thought. But I must admit, that these once harmless words now sting just a little bit.
Dear New Dad,
I love you. I love the way our baby’s face lights up when you come home from work. I love the giggles that fill our house when you two play together. But I want you to know that this mom thing is harder than I ever thought and sometimes I need your help with a few things.
It’s been a crazy morning! After a fun filled weekend including my son’s first trip to the zoo, we’re exhausted and totally unprepared for the week. The house is a mess and i’m running extra late for our Monday, Mommy and Me class.
I have to shout this one from the rooftops as i’m not sure if this anomaly will ever happen again! We just had the perfect Saturday morning! It was the kind of Saturday morning that little girls dream of when they think of what their families will be like one day.
When it was time to feed him, I excitedly took out the “yummy” food I had prepared in the morning. I was sure he would eat it this time! I lifted the colorful spoon to his little mouth and… he whacked it away with his hand! Freshly pureed fruit and veggies went flying across the room. His mouth remained clenched and I was exasperated.
“You’re so lucky! You have round the clock babysitters for your baby!” This is one of those “jokes” you should probably keep to yourself. NICU moms would hardly ever think of their situation as lucky and would give anything to be at home with their baby.
I had no idea I had preeclampsia. My pregnancy had already been so difficult that I missed some symptoms and totally ignored the others. It was fate and God that saved my son and I from the dangers of this life threatening condition.
This was it. They unplugged my baby from all of the wires he had been connected to for months and put him in my arms. A part of me wanted to just clutch him tightly and run right out of there. I wished that I could just take him home, but we weren’t there yet. He needed open heart surgery.
Our NICU stay felt like a never-ending, roller coaster ride. It was the kind of ride that takes you high up into the sky one minute but then drops you hundreds of feet from a sharp angle the next.
